Let me do some seemingly random rambling. I was pondering the state of evergreens. The innocence they seem to have which I will never figure even if my life should depend on it. The extreme shyness that seems to be packaged along with it baffles me. However meet the hybrid evergreens. The stated evergreens that have gone where no proper true evergreen has ever gone. This lot are the new generation grown experienced from increased alcoholic influence. Essentially, they still don’t know how to take care of a girl the way a girl deserves to be loved. And I was pondering on friendship. When friends cross the lines to become more, can you ever take a step back and keep the friendship? Chole e other intern, says the moment you cross the line you’re screwed. You will never look at your friend the same way again. He will not be friend X, but friend who’s interested, or friend you’ve kissed, or friend you’ve held, or friend you’ve ____. Yea, she says it’ll never be the same again. I wondered and realized I don’t agree. If you cant be normal friends with a guy you’ve dated/kissed, I’d be kinda short of friends right now. I think a friendship shouldn’t be thrown away just cos the guy stupidly fell for u, or u guys got drunk enough to make out. I suppose I believe friendships should be strong enough to withstand such shit humans get themselves into.

OKAY that’s all. I shall stop before I give the show away ;) celebrated teletubby’s birthday yesterday. Lucky boy, jean surprised him at dinner, jas surprised him with a cake and Brandon, just surprised him. Haha. There was supposed to be a kiss (by mel’s declaration…) which did not happen. After the absolute random meeting of random people, Brandon drove this Kongwei guy and I off to zouk. Did I mention I love his car? It’s a pretty red car =) don’t ask me what e hell it is. Its got 4 wheels and 4 doors. I just like it cos its red and rather small. Quite a sexy car I should think. We both went there with a common agenda of meeting someone. Kongwei just played supporting player. Was supposed to meet the divers but I was so late they ended up walking from Zouk to like Tanglin to stone while waiting for me =x made me feel awfully bad. Well I was feeling a little down, cos I looked forward to seeing someone who decided at the very last minute not to show up. I admit I was rather down  so I decided to go and meet hot handsome people and have a hell of a time. AND, as I wandered round e club w e 2 guys, checking out the crowd and such, this familiar frame loomed in front of me. I wasn’t hoping for much so didn’t really notice him, until he stopped in front of me and … … I swear I was close to tears  the disappointment and dashed hopes went out the window and this odd extreme happiness took over. Been awhile since I felt such random intense delight. He said he wasn’t coming! It was the sweetest surprise I’d had in a friggin long time. In fact, I cant remember when I last felt this. But happiness was short-lived. Yeap.. EVERGREENS. Ugh, this I will rant in private. Angry. So yea, went walking with the guys a little more and randomly decided to drink. Mel, knowing she couldn’t drink, SHARED one cup with Brandon. Talk about self control =) but he drank so slowly she got bored and downed the cup for him. Walked around, slacked around and went for supper. Bumped into him along the way  and his bloody, bloody, cute friend. Haha sweet. Back in e club, got disappointed time and time again. Gave up on e insensitive ass and went to look for my diving buddies. Haha divers are crazy. Totally insane. Haha which also means loads of fun and retarded highness! I had fun till I got a text saying he was heading outside for awhile. Went to look for him…disappointing. Then we all went to dance and get high again haha. After exhausting ourselves, headed outside to get some air. AND, I got disappointed again, and again. Another private story for the ears of the deserving only. SIGH. Males. I don’t get it. So I decided, “okay fine. We’re both not seriously bout each other then, this shall really be a fling. Have fun then screw it la!” but no, e chap went all emo and decided to have a HTHT and try to iron things out between us. Absolutely neglecting ignorant of my disappointment. Seriously, he was faking it. He REALLY didn’t know (that is why I don’t date evergreens.ugh) so I explained it to him (yes I know I’m NEVER that kind, but this time I actually tried). But did he get it? NO. did he repeat the exact same mistake? YES. At that point, I was really. Okay I don’t know how to describe it but hell, it wasn’t nice. The most infuriating thing was I knew he didn’t mean it. He wasn’t being a jerk, he was being, innocent! I don’t know how else to put it. Ugh. Its okay…

We will talk about it tomorrow then make a call. Then I’ll leave and go diving, taking whatever big decision we make along with me 

I’ve no net, so I wont be able to blog or msn or facebook for goodness knows how long till I go to didi’s house to use his computer. My best friend’s e best really. Haha =)